The Slow & Steady Wins the Race?
So as I write this, I am mentally running through all of my pending to do’s. Put the mountain of washing on, declutter my wardrobe (for the umpteenth time), source baby essentials, plan that gift, swap out dwindling household items for eco alternatives, return that thingy...yes the list goes on ( I won't bore you with further details). Like magic, it is a self replenishing list too, never to be completed - even with the most triumphant attempts. In this regard, I am definitely acting like the hurrying, scurrying hare in the fable of the Hare & Tortoise.
How many of us are the Hare? Speaking to girlfriends, it seems quite a lot of us indeed. The first time I felt that I wasn’t crazy or alone in this phenomena was watching Sarah Jessica Parker play the pinnacle of to-do-list mavens: Kate Reddy, in the movie ‘How does she do it?’ The scene that stuck with me was when she lay in bed, frantically visually running through her mental to do list. It hit me, I do this on a daily basis. THAT IS ME! (I know, nothing to be proud of)!
The imperfection of Perfection.
Like Kate, we all have several roles and responsibilities to play in our daily lives, be it at work, home, as a daughter, friend, wife, parent - and part of the problem is that we are all striving for perfection in all of those seemingly distinct arenas. Let’s be honest - Who wants to work a 40 hour week, and NOT be a good friend, NOT exercise, NOT juggle a passion project, NOT make time for your loved ones, NOT pursue hobbies and read books in your ‘spare’ time. Exactly.It sounds crazy to write it down this way, but many of us are guilty of trying to do it all… Afterall, so much in society tells us that we can and indeed, should do more. Afterall, our capitalist society hinges on measuring our collective outputs.
In this modern day and age, we have all the means to succeed at these items, but have they gotten harder to accomplish in our fast-paced lives? Think about it, 60 odd years ago, there were no laptops, social media didn’t exist, we weren’t told that we could do it all. (And yes, I realise that many groups were excluded from opportunities during this time).
So have the times changed, but the social expectations remained the same?
Given that we have had the advent of constant connection, to work, play. We’re all significantly more stretched than our parents or grandparents ever were. Picture this, they left work at say, 6pm and that was it. No emails flying in after that sacred hour, no calls, no texts from friends for cajoling to a bar/restaurant. Times were somewhat simpler in day to day life. Hell, even I remember meeting friends in ‘town’ by a physical landmark, otherwise you’d have no way of finding them at the allotted time and you certainly couldn’t ever drop a ‘i’m running late’ text. So with this simplicity came slower paced lives (and in some respect with less freedoms/opportunities). So what to do when your non-physical life is full of stuff: obligations, your to do list, hobbies and general mind clutter? Declutter it Marie Kondo style.
In comes Essentialism - What is it you ask?
According to Greg McKeown, Author of Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Doing Less, Essentialism is about having a streamlined approach to increase our efforts/productivity in important areas of our lives. In short, instead of feeling like you have to do everything, do the things that are important to you (and bring you joy - I added this piece myself!) In today’s climate of do more, achieve more, be more; this sounds like the Marie Kondo clean-up of our time/schedules. In essence the main take-aways are;
Essentialism 101
Do the things that are aligned with your purpose/mission
Learn to say NO to things that deviate from the above. Yes, it’s hard but it needs to be done.
Streamline your efforts for the things you have to do, but aren’t aligned with #1
Manage your time so that you are maximizing effort (and refer back to #2)
The Big Slowdown.
By now we all know that slow and steady is the healthiest way to live (i won’t go into details about burnout, or share the numerous studies about burnout - ok maybe I will in references). In a society that encourages speed and high levels of productivity, slowness is something that we need to cultivate in our daily lives, to take a step back, be in the now. Most crucial to this process is to set-up those personal boundaries to say NO.
How to Slow Time (without a time machine):
Practice meditation/mindfulness
Learn from the Japanese:
Ikigai: Develop a hobby or pursuit that gives you purpose
Shinrin-Yoku: Connect with nature
Rest: Build time for the odd duvet day or Netflix binge
Stay away from screens (instantly slows things down)
Read a book
So take ownership of your most precious commodity, time and see if you feel a little more like the calm tortoise.
